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Just remember...we warned you these were really bad!
- Why did the guy try to avoid eye surgery by rubbing ketchup in his eyes? He had heard that Heinz sight was 20/20.
- Patient: “Doc, I get a stabbing pain in my eye every time I take a sip of coffee." Doctor: “Have you tried taking the spoon out of the mug?"
- What do you call a penguin with no eye? A pengun!
- At what elevation is your vision the best? See Level.
- Why don’t optometrists use tape measures? They’re really good at eyeballing it.
- What did the eyeball say to the eyelid? "I wish you wouldn't keep me in the dark!"
- Why did the pirate walk into the bar? He had his patch on the wrong eye.
- Cop: “Let me know if you see the suspect with one eye.” Bystander: “I already saw him run that way, but I was using both my eyes.”
- Man 1: “I stopped seeing my girlfriend two days ago.” Man 2: “Really? What happened?” Man 1: “She accidentally poked me in the eyes.”
- Woman 1: “I used to date a man with a lazy eye.” Woman 2: “Why did you stop?” Woman 1: “He was seeing someone on the side.”
- Patient: “Doc, my eyes are really dry.” Eye Doctor: “Here, smell this onion.” Patient: “That made me cry!” Eye Doctor: “Great, I pulled out the onion to make you moist-your-eyes.”
- How are your eye doctor and your teacher the same? They both spend their days testing pupils!
Is making an appointment for a comprehensive eye exam for your children on your back-to-school checklist? It needs to be.
No amount of new clothes, backpacks, or supplies will allow your child to reach their potential in school if they have an undetected vision problem.
The difference between eye exams and vision screenings
An annual exam done by an eye doctor is more focused than a visual screening done at school. School screenings are simply "pass-fail tests" that are often limited to measuring a child’s sight clarity and visual acuity up to a distance of 20 feet. But this can provide a false sense of security.
There are important differences between a screening and a comprehensive eye exam.
Where a screening tests only for visual acuity, comprehensive exams will test for acuity, chronic diseases, color vision, and eye tracking. This means a child may pass a vision screening at school because they are able to see the board, but they may not be able to see the words in the textbook in front of them.
Why back-to-school eye exams matter
Did you know that 1 out of 4 children has an undiagnosed vision problem because changes in their eyesight go unrecognized?
Myopia, or nearsightedness, is a common condition in children that often develops around the ages of 6 or 7. And nearsightedness can change very quickly, especially between the ages of 11 and 13, which means that an eye prescription can change rapidly over a short period of time. That’s why
